How I Met Your Mother
by Letters To Her
Summary: In 1929, 38 year old Jack Dawson sits down with his kids to tell them the story of how he met their mother, Rose DeWitt Bukater. T for Launguage.


_How I Met Your Mother_

**A/N: Jack a little OCC. Don't own characters...insert more legal stuff here. Enjoy!**

* * *

"Well kids, I think it's time for you to know the story of how I met your mother." Jack said, as he sit down in front of his kids on the leather couch in the living room.

"It all started on the Unsinkable RMS Titanic..."

"Really?!" His kids said in awe.

"Yes, now if you'll let me continue..."

I had just won two third class tickets on the Titanic in a game of poker. I won them against two Swedish fellows. My buddy Fabrizio and I headed to Southampton dock to just barley make it. And kids, if I had never won those tickets, I've would have never met your mother. On with the story...

"We're the luckiest sons of bitches in world! You know that!?" I said, hanging my somewhat giant sac over my shoulder.

"I go to America!" Fabrizio shouted, following Jack to their cabins.

* * *

*Snore*

"Kids!" Jack said, waking up his children.

"What?" They said, groggily.

"Your supposed to listening to my story"

"Well, can you get the part when you meet mom? This story is so far a snooze-fest" Jack's eldest son, Jake said.

"I think it's going to get better-it is going to get better, right dad?"

"Yes! Thank you Josie."

* * *

"It was 9:00 pm as I looked up at the stars-"

* * *

"Hey hey, hold up. What happened in the past 9 hours?" Jake asked.

"Well, honestly, I don't have a damn clue. On with the story.."

As I was saying, I was looking up at the stars, I had a cheap cigarette hanging out my mouth, then I heard a woman panting, running toward the stern of the ship. She had fiery red curls, wore a red satin dress, tears streaming down her face. Yes kids. That woman is your mother."

"Great, I'm going to go play now-" Jake said, as he got up from the couch.

"Ummm... Don't you want to hear the story of how your mother and I survived the sinking, and what happened along the way, and how she was engaged when I met her?"

"Umm..not really." Josie replied.

"Well, that's too bad for you, because I'm telling it to you anyway."

So, as I was saying. As I looked back, I could see her climbing the stern of the ship, so it looked like she was going to commit suicide. And me, being the great gentleman I was, I slowly walked up to her.

"Don't do it"

"Stay back! Don't come any closer!"

"Come on, just give me your hand. I'll pull you back over"

"No, stay where you are! I mean it! I'll let go!"

"No, you won't."

"What do you mean, "No, I won't"? Don't presume to tell me what I will and will not do, you don't know me!"

"Well, you woulda done it already."

"You're distracting me! Go away!"

"I can't. I'm involved now. You let go, and I'm, I'm 'onna have to jump in there after you."

"Don't be absurd. You'd be killed!"

"I'm a good swimmer."

"The fall alone would kill you."

"It would hurt. I'm not saying it wouldn't. Tell you the truth, I'm a lot more concerned about that water being so cold."

"How cold?"

"Freezing. Maybe a couple degrees over. You ever, uh, you ever been to Wisconsin?"

"What?"

"Well, they have some of the coldest winters around. I grew up there, near Chippewa Falls. I remember when I was a kid, me and my father, we went ice fishing out on Lake Wissota. Ice fishing is, you know, where you..."

"I know what ice fishing is!"

Sorry. You just seem like, you know, kind of an indoor girl. Anyway, I, uh, I fell through some thin ice; and I'm telling you, water that cold, like right down there..."

"It hits you like a thousand knives stabbing you all over your body. You can't breathe. You can't think. At least, not about anything but the pain. Which is why I'm not looking forward to jumping in there after you."

"Like I said, I don't have a choice. I guess I'm kinda hoping you'll come back over the railing, an' get me off the hook here."

"You're crazy."

"That's what everybody says but, with all due respect, Miss, I'm not the one hanging off the back of a ship here. Come on. C'mon, give me your hand. You don't want to do this."

She took my hand.

"Whew! I'm Jack Dawson."

"Rose DeWitt Bukater."

"I'm gonna have to get you to write that one down."

* * *

Just before I could pull her up fully up and over the railing, she fell, but I grabbed her arm just in time, and I pulled her up.

"Can you just skip to the interesting parts?" Jake and Josie begged.

"Fiiinnne."

Kids these days just don't like to listen.

"Ok fine, but here is what happened."

A little while after your mother-Rose I mean, attempted to commit suicide, I was being accused of rape. So then, her fiancée Cal go all up in my face.

I knew that Rose's mother and her fiancée had no idea that she was suicidal. So I went along with her lie, stating that she was leaning over to look at the ship's propellers, and she slipped. After that, Cal offered me to dine in first class for dinner with him and Rose, for saving the woman he "loves."

So I accepted the offer, and the next day Rose invited me to talk with her up at B deck. Or was it A deck? Or C deck? Whatever, on with the story.

"So, we've walked about a mile of his ship, we chewed on how great the weather has been, and how I grew up, but I assume that's not why invited me up here to talk with you."

Now kids, you have to remember that I'm almost 40 and can't remember where my glasses are. So I don't really remember what she said after but I do remember your mother showing her engagement ring to me and me exclaiming...

* * *

"God, look at that thing! You would've gone straight to the bottom."

Then, I remember Rose complaining how she was trapped in her high-class world and stuff, and then I obnoxiously asked..

"Do you love him?"

"What? I have no idea what you are talking about Mr. Dawso-Jack."

"Do you love him? Your fiancée?"

"Your being absurd!"

I knew right off the bat that she didn't love him. If she did she would have simply answered the question.

So when we got into a playful fight yadda yadda yadda, I showed her some of my drawings...

* * *

"I still can't believe that you asked her if she loves her fiancée!" Josie exclaimed.

Jack, getting extremely impatient, replied "If if weren't for that question, none of you could have been born! So shut your goddamn faces and let me finish my fucking story. Shall I continue?"

"Yes Sir." Josie and Jake said, nodding their heads furiously, their faces had a look of slight fear.

"Jack! Don't talk to our children like that!" Rose exclaimed, as she walked into the room.

Jack: *facepalm*

* * *

So Rose said that my drawings were amazing, what can I say. I have gift. So, I can't really remember what happened after that, oh yeah. Rose and I began leaning over Titanic's rails, talking about going to Santa Monica Pier (where we had our honeymoon, by the way) and riding horses on the beach, chewing tobacco like a man, and then I taught Rose how to spit like a man.

"That was better, but you really got to hawk it back" I said, spitting hard over Titanic's railing.

* * *

"Dad...that is disgusting." Josie said in pure disgust.

Jack shot her a death glare, and Josie put a hand over her mouth.

Then Rose's mother Ruth took her away to help her get ready for dinner. Then Molly Brown (Which you probably know as The 'Unsinkable' Molly Brown) asked me if I have any idea if I know what I'm getting myself into.

"So sonny, what do you plan wearing to dinner?" Molly asked me.

I gestured to my voluptuous suspenders.

* * *

Josie and Jake raised an eyebrow.

"What? I looked pretty damn sexy in suspenders. Just ask your mom." I said in defense.

"He's not lying." Rose said, as she walked into the room.

"Uhh..Thanks for that mom..." Jake said awkwardly.

"WHO WANTS ICECREAM?!" Rose asked.

"At this rate, I'm never going to finish this story..."

***1 hour later and back from Icecream***

"Ok, now that's out of the way, I'm going to continue my story." Jack said, as he sat back down in the leather couch in the living room.

So where was I...ah yes. Molly Brown. So here's what happened. Molly let me borrow the expensive tuxedo that she had picked up in Southampton for her son about my age.

"You shine up like a new penny." Molly calmly exclaimed. She chuckled to herself at her remark.

***Skip To Dinner***

Jack: *Kisses Rose on the hand*

***20 minutes later***

So, I said some long ass quote about having air in my lungs and a few black sheets of paper, have no idea what I said, but whatever.

Everyone: To Making It Count.

"..."

"..."

"..."

"Dad?" Josie and Jake asked.

"I'm trying to remember what happened after that...ahhh!"

I slipped a note into Rose's hand while I kissed it, it said "To Making It Count, Meet Me At The Clock."

"So umm...we danced at a party, third-class style of course."

"Then the next day, I told how her fire was gonna burn out and some shit, and then we hooked-up."

Then Rose told me to draw her like one of my French girls, nude wearing The Heart Of The Ocean, Cal's engagement present to your mother. So I drew her, and no. We didn't do it. That was later" *Jack gives a winky face*

So then Cal's retard of a bodyguard chased us around the ship then we went into a back of a car...then we fuc- *Rose gives Jack a glare* made love." *Rose smiles at Jack, then leaves the room*

So, then Rose and I went out to Titanic bow and laughed, as I kept exclaiming,

"Did you see those guys' faces?"

So...we kept making out until the iceberg hit. So then we went up to Rose's stateroom, and no. Not to 'make love' again. (I wish). Anyway, we went back to Rose's stateroom and warned Cal and Rose's mother Ruth about the collision. But that 'unimaginable bastard' (as Rose likes to call him) had his moron of a bodyguard Lovejoy, slip The Heart Of The Ocean into my jacket pocket.

So then I got arrested by the master-at-arms and blah blah blah water filling up...ships gonna sink...Rose saves the day with an axe...Rose refuses to get on a lifeboat because of her undying love for me...we clutch the railing of the stern of the ship for dear life...I find a door that can only hold person (Yeah, thanks a lot James Cameron)...almost die for her...rescued...married...had Jake...had Josie...present day.

"And that kids, is how I met, fell in love with, and almost died for, your mother"

"Damn that was a long story." Jake said.

"Yea, I agree with Jake." Josie replied.

"Yeah, it felt like the story went in for 3 hours." Josie remarked.

"Well, now that I'm done telling a story that would've made most people cry (assuming I died and Rose was narrating the story, in detail) and a story that your going to forgot in 5 minutes. I'm gonna go take a nap now. Bye"

* * *

**A/N: So Jack was a little OCC here but, hey? Was it worth it? Please Review! Also, I didn't post this in the crossover for How I Met Your Mother and Titanic because the story has nothing to do with the characters (Ted, Robin, Lily, Barney, Marshall ect.) only the idea is based off the TV series, How I Met Your Mother. So that's why. REVIEW!❤**


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